Deciding what to keep when a loved one dies can be a difficult decision. Going through belongings that hold many memories or have value can bring up a lot of emotions, which can make the task even more difficult.
I lost both of my Grandmothers in the past five years (both of whom were widowed) and my husband was the Executor of my maternal Grandmother's estate when she died in 2012. My emotions were all over the place when she died because her death was unexpected, so I had a hard time letting go of her things. I didn't want to let go of my Grandparents (I was very close to both of them), so in my mind, holding on to them was holding on to their "stuff." We use most of the things we kept but I realize now that when my emotions are making the decisions, I tend to go overboard and I held on to some things that I didn't know what to do with or that didn't serve a purpose.
When my other Grandmother passed away over the summer, my prior experience put things in perspective and I was able to give more thought to things that were important to me, and ask for those particular items. My paternal Grandparents had a lot more children and Grandchildren than my other Grandparents had, so many of their things already had a home to go to, which was nice!
Since this experience is still fresh in my mind, I'd like to share a few things that I feel are important questions to ask yourself before deciding what to keep AND some ways you can use these things in your own home. I hope you find this helpful!
1. Will you use it?
Will you REALLY use it?
I ended up with some things I thought I would use, but never used them. I don't even drink wine and took home two corkscrews. I didn't really need another set of nylon cooking utensils. I also never really had any interest in sewing, so the hundreds of spools filled with thread just became clutter. More to dig through in the kitchen drawers and threads and scissors, and scissors, and more scissors in my craft area. I used the pinking shears once while making a neat pattern at the edge of some craft paper for a project, but that's it. Anyway, you get the picture. The thought of letting go of my Grandmother's sewing supplies felt like I was losing that part of her but I never really had an interest in sewing. I've decided I'm going to use her sewing cabinet as a record cabinet and the spools, scissors, and outdated fabric have to go.
If I had asked myself that question five years ago and really taken the time to think about it, I wouldn't have so much to sort through now and had things in the way all this time. I think it's okay to have a few things just to display for decoration that you may not use, but if you're taking things that will become clutter or that you have to store, you'll definitely want to think about the answer to this question.
I'm one who loves dishes and using a mix of pretty pieces when I entertain company, so taking my Great-Grandmother's china set was a clear decision. I loved the pattern and I am able to nicely display it in this vintage display cabinet, which was also passed down to me. The silver set inside the cabinet would be an example of something I wouldn't use but enjoy displaying because it was one of my Grandparent's wedding gifts.
